Every planet we reach is dead

Ask me anything   My name is Math. I am from K-Town outside of Washington DC. I'm 3/4 Korean, half Irish, a quarter Jewish, and 1/8 Black.

I hail from a cursed line, the O'McYamazakisteins, whose progenitor so offended the Colonel that he has doomed the male scions of the family to be half werewolf, half normal wolf. Despite this handicap, I attended Cambridge University with my best friend Isaac Newton, studying Theory of Law and Ninjitsu. After being disillusioned by the old boys clubs of European Ninjitsu, I took to the seas as a crab/Jormungandr fisherman, eventually being shipwrecked along the arctic coast.

I was taken in by a clan of Inuit circus folk, learning their ways and marrying their seven most attractive daughters. But, of course, by the late 1970's all the Inuit had been wiped out by the Finnish Robot Army.

So now I wander the land with my faithful polar bear steed, Snorlax, and my floating pickle sidekick, Eustace, righting wrongs and progressing through my Cupcake-a-Day Calendar.

hungoverowls:

“There’s…there’s juice in the fridge. Just…just fucking take it.”

This is the best idea anyone has ever had, and I’m including bacon.

hungoverowls:

“There’s…there’s juice in the fridge. Just…just fucking take it.”

This is the best idea anyone has ever had, and I’m including bacon.

— 1 year ago with 114 notes
  1. kaiaiai reblogged this from hungoverowls
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  5. captainsombrero reblogged this from hungoverowls and added:
    “You’re still here? I…I thought you were leaving…Whassat? You did leave? How’d you get ba- oh. OH YOU DROVE MY CAR?!...
  6. faic--s reblogged this from hungoverowls
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  13. haleynothaleigh reblogged this from hungoverowls and added:
    I need to stop reblogging hungoverowls every time I know I’m going to be hungover, but I just can’t resist.
  14. jawsthatbite reblogged this from hungoverowls
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  16. letitallbe reblogged this from hungoverowls
  17. nopancakehouses reblogged this from hungoverowls and added:
    HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
  18. seanblr reblogged this from hungoverowls and added:
    hungover owls
  19. pixelatedbloodcells reblogged this from hungoverowls
  20. rhymeswithjulie reblogged this from hungoverowls and added:
    This tumblr is quite possibly...funniest thing I have seen in a long, long time. The name...
  21. seeyouinmacrame reblogged this from hungoverowls and added:
    new. favorite. tumblr.
  22. theomphalos reblogged this from hungoverowls and added:
    best idea anyone has ever had, and I’m including bacon.
  23. northerncity reblogged this from hungoverowls
  24. darthsarah reblogged this from hungoverowls and added:
    Hahahah! Hungover Owls FTW
  25. lunar-caustic reblogged this from hungoverowls and added:
    Ahahaha I have been giggling over this blog all morning. It’s 4:00...afternoon, actually,...
  26. ghnfennn reblogged this from hungoverowls
  27. chimera-en-twin reblogged this from hungoverowls
  28. darcibastiaan reblogged this from hungoverowls
  29. lmd reblogged this from hungoverowls and added:
    you guys. i can’t even deal. (or stop laughing.) god bless you, internet.
  30. dreamsower reblogged this from hungoverowls
  31. scuzzlebuttsscuttlebutt reblogged this from hungoverowls
  32. samlroth reblogged this from hungoverowls
  33. baseln reblogged this from hungoverowls and added:
    truest thing ever.